I hate goodbyes...I always have. They crush me.
Saying goodbye to someone you care about, who you have cared about for over a year...it’s hard. It sucks.
Sometimes we prolong things because we’re afraid to say goodbye. Afraid of not having him in your life anymore. Afraid of not having him there to pick you up when you’re having a bad day. Afraid of not hearing him calling you by the nickname he gave you. Afraid you will never again laugh at the inside jokes you share. Afraid you will never again melt from him looking at you with that boyish grin. Afraid you won’t feel the chills you get when he touches you. Afraid you won’t have that feeling of safe happiness you get when he gives you one of his amazing hugs (god I love hugs). Afraid you won’t have that feeling of when you two are out together in a crowded place it still feels like it’s just the two of you. Like no one else is there. Afraid of being alone and starting all over again. I still remember the very first second I saw him walk into the bar over a year ago. Our eyes connected and I just knew we would be together. It was instant attraction. Sigh...
But when you think with your head instead of your heart you know it’s the right thing to do. To say goodbye, I mean. Being afraid to move on is never a reason to stay in a relationship that isn’t working. You know you both want very different things and it’s time to move on. Yes, there are lots of good things, but there are many things that just do not work too. Why is it that in relationships it very often seems one person wants more than the other. That one person is willing to make the other a priority, but the other person is not willing to do the same. I think we all want to be a priority to someone don’t we? I think we all deserve that.
Goodbyes are tough for me. I hate them. I do. But they are a reality. Sometimes they have to happen to get to being happy again. Of course I wish him all the best and still care about him but it was just time to say goodbye.
Enough of that...Time for this girl to pick herself up, dust herself off and SMILE! Time to start a new chapter! That’s kind of what life is like...Chapters in a book. Excited to see what happens next. Stay tuned!
You know what always picks me back up? A good long RUN! Works every single time. As I was driving to work this morning seeing the morning runners along the beach I knew that was what I needed. It’s a beautiful sunny day here in Boston and I see a nice long run in my afternoon plans. Just me and my music. And then later this evening out with my girlies for lots of laughs (and maybe...ahem...definitely...a margarita!)
Ok guys! Have yourselves an awesome weekend! Talk to you soon